The Power of Purposeful Words – Part 3

This is a big week for our family, as my husband will be sitting for a promotional board interview.  His job has a unique process where you first apply for promotion, a select number are chosen for interviews, and then from those they choose the individuals who will be promoted.  So we are in the middle of the process, so to speak, and it’s a pretty big deal!

Anyways, with that in mind, I want the topic for this week in our Power of Purposeful Words series to be Encouraging Words!  It is easy to be encouraging and to send my husband off with words of support when he is headed to an interview, but it is not always so simple.

As human beings, we all need encouragement.  We all face times of struggle where we really wish for someone to come along side us for support and encouragement.  We want the motivation, inspiration, and confidence of a friend! We long to hear the words, “Keep going,” “You’ve got this,” or “Keep up the good work!”

Our husbands are no different.  I want you to stop for a moment and think, “When was the last time I spoke words of encouragement to my husband?”

Often, we remember to encourage a friend.  We see strangers and our hearts soften as we see their needs.  But sometimes, because we live day-in and day-out with our husbands, we miss the signs that he needs encouragement.  Often because our struggles are so similar – we both have to deal with the crying baby, messy house, financial strain, church problems, etc – we forget to offer words of encouragement to the person closest to us.

I love the book of Ecclesiastes, and it is there we find the words, “Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up!”  Read that last line again …

In other words, “How miserable is the condition of one who is alone when he stumbles without anyone to help pick him up!”

Have you ever been there?  Struggling, stuck, lost … and alone?

I know I have! And I do not say that to gain pity or to make this about myself; I tell you that to say I understand the terrible feeling of loneliness in the midst of pain and struggle, and I don’t want anyone else to experience that, especially my husband!

Hebrews 10:23-25 shares the exact antithesis of this scenario.  It reads, “Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.”

So, based simply on this Scripture passage, how can we offer support to a spouse or friend in need:

• Remember the promises of the Faithful One – Even when we do not have our own words of encouragement to share, we can remember God’s faithfulness and remind others of His work in their lives.
• Stir each other up to love and good works – Some days we all need to be challenged to “keep on keeping on” in our journey on this earth. We can offer motivation and assistance to others. Knowing we are not alone can be a powerful inspiration.
• Be physically together – Sometimes it is as simple as sitting nearby. Other times it is engaging in activities together. Holding hands or physical touch can be an encouragement as well.
• Encourage each other – Know what helps lift the spirit of those closest to you. Words like, “You can do this!” or “I’m here to help in any way I can” can provide encouragement. What life-giving words can you offer to your husband? What helps him sense your love and support?

In different scenarios the words may sound different, but the principle is the same.  If your husband is discouraged, remind him of God’s promises.  When he is ready to quit, encourage him to keep on going.  Be present, ready to listen.  And speak words of encouragement!

What will you say to encourage your husband today?

PS: If you’ve missed the other Power of Purposeful Words posts, you can find them here (about giving your husband the silent treatment), here (about a soft answer), and here (about sweet or gracious words)!